“Doctor, I Just Want to Know What I’m Doing Wrong”
I still remember the conversation I had with her when she first came to me.
She was trying to conceive, and like many women I meet, she had reached a point where every decision about food and lifestyle had started feeling complicated. She had been reading about fertility online, listening to advice from different people and wondering if she was doing enough.
And then she said something that stayed with me:
“Doctor, I just want to know what I’m doing wrong.”
That sentence told me a lot. Because when you’re trying to conceive and things aren’t happening as quickly as you hoped, it’s very easy to start blaming yourself.
Maybe I’m eating the wrong foods.
Maybe I should lose weight.
Maybe I need more supplements.
Maybe I shouldn’t exercise.
Maybe something is wrong with my body.
But my first conversation with her wasn’t about giving her a long list of foods she couldn’t eat.
It was about taking away some of that fear. We didn’t start with a “fertility diet.” I told her, “Let’s first understand what your body needs.” We looked at her overall nutrition, lifestyle, daily routine, menstrual cycle and the areas that needed attention. Because fertility nutrition isn’t about finding one magical food that will make you pregnant.
It’s about looking at the bigger picture. We worked on creating balanced meals using foods that were realistic for her everyday life. No extreme restrictions.No complicated recipes. No expectation that she had to eat perfectly every single day. Instead, we focused on consistency.
And then came the part that made the biggest difference, accountability. Inside my 100-Day TTC Program, she wasn’t simply given a diet chart and sent home.We stayed connected. She had regular consultations and check-ins, and we looked at what was actually happening in her day-to-day life. If something wasn’t working, we adjusted it. If she was struggling with a habit, we worked through it. If she had questions, she had somewhere to bring them instead of turning to Google and becoming even more confused. Slowly, I saw something change. It wasn’t just what she was eating. Her confidence changed. She started understanding her body instead of constantly questioning it. At one point, she told me, “I feel like I finally know what I’m supposed to do instead of trying something different every week.” And then came the message I will never forget. She was still within her 100-day journey when she reached out to me with the news, “Doctor, I’m pregnant.” I remember how special that moment felt. After all the conversations, the questions, the small lifestyle changes and the work we had done together, receiving that message was incredibly emotional. She had conceived during her 100-day journey with us.
Now, as a nutritionist, I want to be very responsible about how I tell this story. I would never say that our program caused her pregnancy. Conception is complex, and there are many factors involved. But what I can say is that during those 100 days, we worked on supporting her nutritional health, lifestyle and overall wellbeing while she continued her fertility care. And she felt more informed, supported and confident throughout the process. Her story is not about a magical food.
It isn’t about a miracle supplement. And it isn’t about a perfect fertility diet. It’s about what can happen when you stop approaching TTC with fear and start approaching it with understanding, structure and support. Because when a woman tells me, “I just want to know what I’m doing wrong,” my answer is often, “Let’s not start by assuming you’re doing something wrong. Let’s start by understanding what your body needs.”
That’s the philosophy behind my 100-Day TTC Program.
Not restriction, Not fear, Not quick fixes.
Personalised nutrition, lifestyle support, education and accountability, one day at a time.
And sometimes, in the middle of that journey, you receive a message that makes all those little steps feel even more special “Doctor, I’m pregnant.”
(Individual experiences vary, and no nutrition program can guarantee conception. Fertility nutrition should complement, not replace, appropriate medical evaluation and treatment.)
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website: drjoline.com